July 2017 – I Should Probably Change

A whole year has gone by since I made an online promise to not buy any new clothes for 12 months. It’s been a fun experiment opening up countless conversations with a whole range of people. It made attending a clothes swap slightly strange, though turns out drinking wine while advising your friends on their purchases is quite fun! I’ve had to straight out avoid certain shops (particularly during the Fatface sale!) and found myself nearly running through charity shops to get to the kids books without being distracted by clothes!

Here’s a few things that surprised me over the year;

1. I’ve realised I wear less than I think

Right at the beginning of the challenge I had a huge clear out. I thought I was done. I was wrong! Over the year it became really clear that I wear less than I think. I turned around all my coat-hangers, only returning them the correct way once an item had been worn. Some of those coat-hangers are still facing the wrong way. In a society that generally encourages more, excess and a wardrobe full of ‘just in case’, I’m enjoying space, less and a wardrobe full of ‘just right’.

2. I kicked my impulsive internet shopping habit

In every area of my purchasing I found myself slowing down, asking ‘do I really need this’ and taking a day or two to ponder. My one impulse buy of a (way to large) train set early this year quickly reminded me (well actually my husband reminded me!) why slowing down has it’s benefits! Early on in the challenge I unsubscribed to lots of marketing emails, this stopped me getting sucked into the rabbit warren that is online shopping and it prevented the kind of ‘quick it’s in the sale’ purchases that I tended towards. I also ‘unfollowed’ various facebook selling groups for the same reasons.

3. My kids ended up with less. They’re naked only half the time

Before the challenge started, I stockpiled kids clothes, being ready for every situation, no matter how many mud kitchens were visited during the week. But cutting down on my clothes naturally resulted in cutting down on my kids clothes. The result has been that over the year I’ve streamlined their wardrobes which (as long as I wash things regularly) has been a space, money and time saver as less choice generally means less clothing battles (or does that only happen in our house?!).

4. My jeans have holes in them, and I’m not ok with that

Four weeks before the end of the challenge my much loved and well worn jeans gave up the ghost. This week I bought a new pair but after getting them home I realised that they weren’t perfect, so I took them back. Before this year I probably would have kept hold of them, worn them but never been totally happy then eventually bought another pair. But not anymore, I’ve realised that I’m now much more picky about what I bring into my home, it needs to serve a purpose, I need to love it, it needs to belong. That perfect pair of jeans is still elusive but I’m holding out!

Recently we had an amazing opportunity to take some time out of normal life and go travelling as a family. Here are a few lessons I’ve learnt along the way!…

1. Packing cubes make life easier

This has been a recent and revolutionary discovery! We have three sets of different coloured packing cubes – think small, zippable canvas..well..cubes! The result? We can share luggage without getting stuff mixed up, see exactly what we have and more importantly when you are in the middle of a Ugandan water shortage, you know what’s clean! They’ve made the constant packing and unpacking loads quicker and more organised, so yep, I’m a big advocate!

2. Eat the camel and seize the day

Our travels were kickstarted by my husband’s nine year long job coming to an end during my maternity leave. Not exactly ideal timing but it got us thinking. We could plow straight into ‘what next?’, begin worrying about the future and start applying for jobs or, we could take a moment to pause. Maybe even seize the opportunity to do something spontaneous with no agenda other than to experience life somewhere else and connect with dear friends. We booked the flights and I’m so glad we did. Yes flying long haul with a four year old and 9 month old has it’s challenges (?!) and we have experienced next level tantrums (on board a small boat in the middle of the Nile of all places!) but those won’t be the things that fill my memories and photo books. I’ve learnt to seize more days, to jump into more moments and when someone offers you camel for dinner, say yes!

3. Find adventure in the everyday

We’ve camped in the middle of the Ugandan bush, experienced a wedding in Oman, run through sand dunes in UAE, we have lived adventure everyday. However this afternoon our daughter spent a good hour making a den from plastic chairs after making a whole crab from bits of several dead crabs, that was today’s adventure. Kid’s have the brilliant ability to be amazed by the ordinary, to sail the pirate infested seas or become a magic-potion-maker without leaving the garden. I don’t want adventure to become something extraordinary, an event for holidays or special occasions. Our trip has taught me to weave it into the small everyday moments and moments that in fact, make up our lives.

4. Kids can cope with weird

I wondered how our eldest child would respond to the ‘different’ we experienced. Particularly the different ethnicities, languages, food and dress in the Middle East and Africa. She was totally unfazed, embracing all aspects of the cultures we visited much better than I expected. She ate (and loved) camel and goat, let her arm be painted in Henna (something I’m almost certain she wouldn’t have done at home) and didn’t once comment on how anyone else looked or spoke. My reflection is that kids cope with ‘weird’ far better than adults and the sooner we expose them to ‘weird’ the better. I want my children to grow into the kind of people who embrace different, who welcome strangers and are kind to the poor. It starts now, it’s on me to introduce them to ‘weird’, to challenge them with ‘different’ and to show them the wonderful variety and colour of our world.

5. It’s only one day

Lots of people have told me they thought we were ‘brave’ or that they couldn’t imagine taking small kids across the world. I think mostly it’s the actual travel that puts people off, having to contain children on a plane, negotiating airports and managing luggage whilst holding small hands. A really wise friend who’s done several long haul flights with kids gave me a great piece of advice she said ‘at the end of the day, no matter what happens, it’s only one day of your life’. That’s the attitude we took, because it was only a day of our life, sure not a day I’d like to repeat a lot(?!) but it was only a day. It’s changed our perspective on journeying with kids and neither of us were daunted by our recent drive and overnight ferry to France (this time last year it would have terrified us!). I wonder how many other things in life I would dive into more willingly if I had the perspective of ‘it’s only one day’?

6. You can never have enough snacks

This speaks for itself and is a truism no matter where you are in the world and no matter how self controlled your children are. Snacks = happiness, end of.

Would love to hear from any other fellow travellers about what you’ve learnt on the journey, whether that’s a quick trip to the coast or a 24 flight to Australia. #travellingWells

Month: July 2017

I didn’t buy clothes for a whole year, and I survived.

6 things travelling with kids taught me